Ward-off the warden

Most of my memories of hostel wardens when I was in Maktab were unpleasant ones. It’s unbelievable what they did to make our lives difficult and they never failed to make us hated them even more. Hence, hostel warden was something I will not sign up for mostly due to my perception of hostel wardens in Maktab.
Unfortunately, you know what they say, what you hate most is exactly what you get. So when I got posted here, I didn’t have a choice but to volunteer myself as the hostel warden as I needed a place to stay. The first year was the most difficult. The place I used to live in was in such a sad state, it made my mum cried when she sent me here the first time. I brought many things from home to make the place more like a place I could call home. Still it didn’t come close to the comfort I have at home.
I was confused of what I was supposed to do. I was staying with two other teachers and I just followed what they did. No briefing or meeting to explicitly tell me what my responsibilities are was done. All I knew was I had to be available to sign students’ cards if they ask to go for outing. Telling which were truths and which weren’t was that hardest part of this job. I failed many times, felt miserable and confused so many times. I felt like I was putting my feet into a trap.
Enduring unfair treatments and double standards for certain things were something I had to deal with. There were many weekends when I stayed alone in school. Slowly I decided to make friends with some of the students. I had a few of them accompanied me at my shabby house. We shared stories and girls’ talk. I had quite a lot of fun frankly speaking. I was beginning to find living here quite okay.
Two months here and I had a new friend. She’s my best friend here, my accomplice, my side-kick and my partner in crime. When I say crime, I mean the times when we went out without notifying anyone. Besides that, now we share something huge in common. We both do not like someone. We are guilty in many accounts, as we gossip about ‘the’ person but it’s just something we share between us. I wish not to talk about her because it’s rather confidential.
Both Suhaili and I share a lot of things. We do almost everything together and I’ve become really attached to her. Not having her around, like tonight, gets a bit lonely. We send our students to hospital together, we go for meetings together, we even cook together. After this she’ll be married, and I’m sure things will change even though she’ll still stay here. Looking at things in positive perspective, I get to accompany her for doctor appointments when she gets pregnant. Hmm, but once she has a baby she can’t stay here anymore I think. I hope I’ll be out of here too by then, or perhaps a new TESL trained teacher could come in handy. She could take my place and I could pack my bags and leave.
Basically, even though we get a place to stay and insyaAllah a steady monthly allowance, our freedom is robbed. We are responsible of every student here and I am no good at being nasty, fierce and evil. I think none of these kids are afraid of me. They seem to be enjoying themselves here and not hating their warden. This is so unlike the norm. Therefore, I believe I have failed. I’m not fit to be a warden, so help me God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!