Sunday, October 31, 2010

SMKTAAC Sports Carnival

SMKTAAC Sports Carnival

Another school event before we close this chapter of school year. After this we’ll be busy with major exams; SPM and STPM. So to my students who’ll be sitting for these major exams, best of luck, peeps! Hope you do well and be great people someday.
Anyways, yesterday our school held a sports carnival to make use of the school replacement on Saturday. Students represented their sports houses to compete in various games; football, netball, volleyball, ping pong and handball.
The one thing I wish I was good at – SPORTS. Unfortunately, I am such an embarrassment on the field, in any event for that matter. I would love to do sports, but never competitively, just for fun and away from the eyes of guys who will laugh at me. Back in school I enjoyed volleyball when I was in form 1 but that was only limited to PE classes when it just all us girls who are more or less had the same sporting ability.
I also remember accompanying Fadilla to MSSD football match because she wanted to support her heart throb. Haha, this will definitely bring back memories from school and we’d now laugh it off. How silly girls were in school. I didn’t have my eyes on anyone in the school team but I did enjoy the occasional tournaments after the year end exams when my heart throb played on the field. There’s nothing hotter than a guy on the field all sweaty and the hair gets a bit dishevelled. Back then I used to hang out with my girl friends and watched the boys played but when my heart throb walked by, I just smiled and said Hi! Hehe…Little did he know I was there just to see him play but of course I played it cool as if I was there for fun. It was quite cute to see some couples back then in school. The girl would wait for the boy, hand him his towel and water tumbler, as well as his backpack. In the school I’m teaching now, students would be pretty much dead if such scene is seen by the teachers. Here, puppy love is taken as a dangerous warning sign. I prefer not to partake in this issue as I myself had had my share of puppy love stories and crushes in school. They’re all harmless to me.
Enough about my school days, let’s get back on track about yesterday. I was in charge of ping pong – boring…I went to the school hall and everything was already in place, thanks to lower 6 students. The game already started and I sat near the girls and tried in vain to understand ping pong. It took quite a while for my slow brain processing to comprehend the point system, but it was getting pretty boring until the state player took the bat into her hands. The pace began to pick up, it was quite fun!
During the break, I made my way to the volleyball court where the fun is. Most people were there perhaps because there isn’t a suitable place to sit at the field to watch football. When I got there the girls were playing, so it wasn’t very heated. Later the boys took over the court and then only we felt the excitement. We were all ooohhh…and ahhh…and yeah…and wah!!! I’d make the best cheerleader I think, not the player. So, if you need someone to accompany you to your futsal game, tennis or badminton match, or even golf? Wait, people are not allowed to make noise at golf tournaments, so that ain’t exciting. Huhu…At 10ish suddenly an announcement was made asking us to go back at 11. Well, that’s early. Apparently it’s the administrator’s instruction and we’re still puzzled as to why we were asked to go back. Rumour has it KPM is going to give us that extra holiday for Raya Haji and we need not replace that holiday. Is that true? I don’t know…but hey, we get to go back early, so that’s real good. I’m now counting down days to go back for year end holidays, but I need to do a bit of going back and forth during the SPM and STPM examination to ‘babysit’ the hostel students who’ll be sitting for the exams. DANG! After that, marking…although dreadful, I always think of the invaluable knowledge gained and the good money :)

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Oh, Malaysia

Do you still remember this song? We sang it during assembly in primary school.
On the shore beyond the tropical sea, you will stand to welcome me. On the shore beneath the sky so blue, all my dreams at last will come true...
When we were in SKSJ (the best primary school ever!), we sang this song every Monday during assembly. Since we're doing a chapter on Happy to be Malaysians I decided to introduce this song to my 1 Harmoni students. Although this is the last class, and many people simply give up on them, I honestly find them really cute. They are easily excited and never fail to amuse me with their funny responses and facial expressions. At the end of the class I usually lose my voice but they make me smile and laugh. They also appreciate me very much and they are easy to 'threat'. I just give a bit of warning and they will keep quiet, but unfortunately not for long. So that explains why I lose my voice every time after class. Soleha, if you still remember, belongs to this class.
I was really pleased with their response to this song. I came up with a singing competition between two groups and they were very enthusiastic to win the so called competition. For the interest they show and effort they put in, I usually buy them gifts and give them rewards. I can't expect them to be excellent, they are far from even passing the exams, but I hope their interest in learning improves and insyaAllah slowly this will help in their learning. Good job, boys and girls!

Giuliana & Bill

As bimboish as this may sound, I must admit that I love watching E! I could do reruns of Kardashians and not get bored of it but what I love most is watching my favourite couple – Giuliana & Bill. To me they represent the real life modern couple. Unlike many others who either look contrived by scripts or totally outrageous, they are believable and I could buy their drama. Just the right amount to make it a TV material show but not too much that it loses its essence of capturing the sweetness of a relationship.
Tonight’s episode was especially important as both of them were trying to get pregnant. I love it when they say they’re trying to get pregnant, instead of she’s trying to get pregnant. Although we all know that scientifically pregnancy is a ‘collaborative’ effort of man and woman, our Asian society always believe that the women are to blame for infertility. In their case, Giuliana was the one with problem but Bill’s commitment in the relationship was so apparent when he stood by her throughout all the procedures, held her close, always encouraging and so full of love. Okay, call me a hopeless romantic but this is exactly what I hope for in a relationship. Someone who is in it for the long run, who’ll be there until the end.
While Bill is constantly busy and focused, Giuliana is funny and sweet. They complement each other so well. Both have their shortcomings, but as Mama said, a marriage works when you can accept your partner’s weaknesses and live with that. Oh, no. DO NOT EXPECT PEOPLE TO CHANGE – it’ll take a miracle. Even though I’m no expert in relationship but a bit of experience and a lot of observation has taught me that, if your man ain’t the sort who’d wash his dishes after he’s done eating, do not waste your energy making him. But on very rare occasions and when the maid isn’t around Bapak would kindly put his dishes in the sink and even wash them. I usually watch this in awe and value each time he does that. HAHA.
Anyhoots, some of the sweetest and real things I learnt when watching this hit reality TV about the best celebrity couple are:
- we’re in this together
- I will not decide until Bill and I are on the same page on this matter: very important to have mutual understanding on issues and address them quickly. No digging up the past later! (my humble, 2 cents worth opinion)
- I will love you, thin, fat, long hair, short hair! *smooch* - awww…
- we’re doing what’s best for the family. What’s best for our future baby
Even in such western setting, many of their values and ways are so much like us. I always believe in taking the good and leaving the bad, hence, take the good things and adapt it to your relationship. As Muslims, never forget to ask the Almighty’s guidance and blessings and submit to Him. I pray that someday I will end up with the most suitable man for me. Hey, I’m 25! I am supposed to at least be thinking of these things right?

Monday, October 18, 2010

Ward-off the warden

Most of my memories of hostel wardens when I was in Maktab were unpleasant ones. It’s unbelievable what they did to make our lives difficult and they never failed to make us hated them even more. Hence, hostel warden was something I will not sign up for mostly due to my perception of hostel wardens in Maktab.
Unfortunately, you know what they say, what you hate most is exactly what you get. So when I got posted here, I didn’t have a choice but to volunteer myself as the hostel warden as I needed a place to stay. The first year was the most difficult. The place I used to live in was in such a sad state, it made my mum cried when she sent me here the first time. I brought many things from home to make the place more like a place I could call home. Still it didn’t come close to the comfort I have at home.
I was confused of what I was supposed to do. I was staying with two other teachers and I just followed what they did. No briefing or meeting to explicitly tell me what my responsibilities are was done. All I knew was I had to be available to sign students’ cards if they ask to go for outing. Telling which were truths and which weren’t was that hardest part of this job. I failed many times, felt miserable and confused so many times. I felt like I was putting my feet into a trap.
Enduring unfair treatments and double standards for certain things were something I had to deal with. There were many weekends when I stayed alone in school. Slowly I decided to make friends with some of the students. I had a few of them accompanied me at my shabby house. We shared stories and girls’ talk. I had quite a lot of fun frankly speaking. I was beginning to find living here quite okay.
Two months here and I had a new friend. She’s my best friend here, my accomplice, my side-kick and my partner in crime. When I say crime, I mean the times when we went out without notifying anyone. Besides that, now we share something huge in common. We both do not like someone. We are guilty in many accounts, as we gossip about ‘the’ person but it’s just something we share between us. I wish not to talk about her because it’s rather confidential.
Both Suhaili and I share a lot of things. We do almost everything together and I’ve become really attached to her. Not having her around, like tonight, gets a bit lonely. We send our students to hospital together, we go for meetings together, we even cook together. After this she’ll be married, and I’m sure things will change even though she’ll still stay here. Looking at things in positive perspective, I get to accompany her for doctor appointments when she gets pregnant. Hmm, but once she has a baby she can’t stay here anymore I think. I hope I’ll be out of here too by then, or perhaps a new TESL trained teacher could come in handy. She could take my place and I could pack my bags and leave.
Basically, even though we get a place to stay and insyaAllah a steady monthly allowance, our freedom is robbed. We are responsible of every student here and I am no good at being nasty, fierce and evil. I think none of these kids are afraid of me. They seem to be enjoying themselves here and not hating their warden. This is so unlike the norm. Therefore, I believe I have failed. I’m not fit to be a warden, so help me God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Let’s do a top 10 list for my favourite things

TOP 10 Hunks! – I like…

10. Maher Zain
9. Remy Ishak
8. Fahrin Ahmad
7. Brad Pitt
6. Chad Michael Murray
5. Takuya Kimura
4. Milo Ventimiglia
3. Chuck – The Chuck Bass
2. Keanu Reaves
1. Johnny Depp

TOP 10 Rom-coms

10. 10 Things I Hate About You
9. Someone Like You
8. The Holiday
7. Ghost of Girl friends Past
6. Never Been Kissed
5. My Best Friend’s Wedding
4. 27 Dresses
3. Made of Honour
2. Love Actually
1. Valentine’s Day

Top 10 Love Songs

10. Dua - KRU
9. Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman – Brain Adams
8. Right Here Waiting – Richard Marx
7. Susun Silang Kata – Aizat
6. You and Me – Lifehouse
5. I’ll Be – Edwin Mccain
4. Tercipta Untukku - Ungu
3. Thank God I Found You – Mariah Carey
2. Never Knew I Needed – Neyo
1. From This Moment – Shania Twain

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Cita-cita Saya

"Bella, bila dah besar awak nak jadi apa?"
"Bila dah besar...saya nak...kahwin dgn Tan Sri cikgu,"
"Kahwin dgn Tan Sri tu bukan cita-cita Bella,"
"Tak dapat Tan Sri, Dato' pun boleh cikgu,"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA - The best lines from Pisau Cukur.

"I nak memancing la...ada ikan besar tak kat sini?" - Bella all grown up...

And coincides with my conversation with our family dentist today.

"You don't have boyfriend?"
"Never mind, after this you can open your Big,big eyes for big,big fish"
"Hahaha, dunno la doctor"
"Find big,big you don't need to's so that you can live a comfortable life. Who wants to work so hard for so long..."

And after my brother's wedding the pressure is ON. Question about marriage will come from every different angle and direction. How do I avert them, what defenses can I put so as to avoid them or rather what should I say to intelligently handle this situation? Having turned down my grandma's proposition to match-make me, my grandma and an aunt from my dad's side are of the impression that I have a boy friend. So, where do I get this boy friend I supposedly have? This still remains a question mark. I'm just not quite lucky in love, perhaps...okay,okay, let's look at the glass half full, the time hasn't arrived yet...there will be a special someone.

This piece of writing lack cohesion. I'm so jumping all over the place. Anyways, the reason why I included the lines above is because I'd like to prove this question, "Are we women, all about the ka-chings?" There's always two arguments behind this question. You can either be a romantic or a practical person. Let's see...
Practical: Love is secondary. We need to live on money because even though money is not everything but everything needs money. So, love can be nurtured. It's very easy for women to fall in live with men but not the opposite. - Is this true?
Romantic: Love is everything. Love makes the world go round and life without love is nothing. - Or could this be right?

What do I think?
I am known as a romantic. I am a sucker for romance movies and always love a happy ending. But I also know that money doesn't grow on love, and everything is expensive. If I were to put it all down...let's look through my needs list:
- I need a roof above my head which is not made of zink or nipah. Just a decent looking home, an apartment would look neat too...but I prefer landed property because I like entertaining guests and I would like to have family members to my house. So a bigger house would be more comfortable.
- Car? As long as the air-cond works and it gets me to where I need to go and I only can drive auto, not by preference but ability.
- Money. I do have my own career and I need someone with a career as well, hopefully someone more successful than me and perhaps of a different field.
- Time. I need someone who has time for me. It's not too much to ask, if I am a wife, that's like my right, right?
- Laughter, Love & Affection. Need I say more? :)
- Compatibility: Emotionally and intellectually

That's a very short list of needs, right? I'm not hard to please...Let's run through my wants list:
- Travelling: I like seeing different places, not necessarily big cities or developed nations. My purpose in travelling is to learn about different culture and seeing it up close and personal. Plus, I also like trying various types of food and also shopping.
- Shopping: Every now and then - not always, I indulge myself with a bit of shopping but I know for a fact I AM NOT A SHOPAHOLIC.
- Cool gadgets - laptop, hand phone and camera
- Facial retreats, sometimes spa and nice make up
- Designer shoes and handbags? HAHA. Not really...well, maybe 1 handbag and a pair of shoes would do just fine...

Since now I am thinking long and hard of what else I want, I believe the list is right about enough. Oh, suddenly nice home furnishing pops in my head. What else, Aida...? Hmm, that's it.

So, do I need or want a millionaire? Nah...What I need is exactly as written in my needs list. That's all. Big fish? Like Bapak said, "Big fish is very risky, it can eat you up!" I like Bapak's style, nice one Bapak. I'll remember that.

O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Embracing little pleasures

I'm home this week as it's the last weekend I have with my parents before they depart for the Holy land to perform Haj. Alhamdulillah...all my best wishes and prayers to both of them. May this ibadah, not merely a visit, but an obligation, bring them closer to God and betterment in every aspect of their life. I love them so much, like words can't describe just how grateful I am to be their daughter and be raised by them. I hope people would say that they raised a good person. InsyaAllah. I hope they are given strength, perseverance and health to perform this obligation and be given satisfaction when the ibadah is completed. Amin.
Today, once I disembarked from the bus and headed on to the LRT, I managed to make last minute plans to meet up Fad, Shaels and Aimi! Yes, the Aimi - the smartest among us. The one with Dr. in front of her name, the one working in Ireland. It has been too long, and she hasn't changed a bit! Still the same slim figure, perhaps only a tad more mature than she used to be, not in a bad way, just enough to qualify her as a successful and beautiful career woman. She must be one heck of a doctor, that woman! I'm always proud of my friends. Hope she continues to do great in her career and bags herself a good husband along the way. Aimi, hmm...she really needs to get someone smart and sweet because that will complement her somewhat stern personality. Of course he must be smart because Aimi needs that intellectual compatibility to spice the relationship. Huhu, as if I know so much! Our dessert plus my quench for savoury food later prolonged to a bit of McD's in Mid Valley where Sab later joined us. Although she was feeling a bit under the weather, as her description, "My stomach is like a washing machine!", she couldn't resist the temptation to have an awesome good time with us! We create our cute scenes everywhere we go. HAHA, but perhaps others would call it noise. Sometimes I wonder, will this still go on when we are all married and have kids? Hmm...these are the people I want to keep in my life if possible forever.
After that I grabbed a few books, you know, to keep me sane and just so I don't lose my English. I hope I'll finish them all. I've bought about 7 books this year and how many have I managed to finish? HAHA. I'm too embarrassed to reveal the amount. Anyways, tomorrow will be family time. We'll be heading to Sg. Ramal, Kajang for Zahir Zharif's majlis turun tanah, because he's already started to crawl. Time flies, kids grow up and before I know it Zharif will be breaking hearts with his dashing good looks - Oh NO, breaking girls' hearts...Ateh does not like that AT ALL! I hope all of us will be blessed with love and happiness because at the end of the day that's all that matters.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Only IDIOTS would...

...kidnap a student from the school hostel, beat him up, cut his hair and leave the boy in the rubber plantation. This heinous act was done by a PARENT. To all parents and future parents: You are role models to your children whether you like it or not. Your actions and words indirectly teach your children about how to function in society and what would be deemed as right or wrong. Hence, to be a parent means you are supposed to display good behaviour if you wish to see your children displaying good behaviour as well. So, don't embarrass yourself, or rather make a fool of yourself by doing such foolish, immature and cruel act, as mentioned above.
Friday, before Friday prayers (exact time, not known)
- Victim was persuaded by kidnapper to enter his car for a chat. The kidnapper, a father of victim's classmate drove off and stopped at the rubber plantation.
- Victim was accused of bullying and cutting his son's hair - only causing the kid to look slightly uglier than he already is - as if his hair will never grow and he will be cursed for a lifetime of baldness.
- The enraged parent punched the victim and shaved his hair.
- Parent walked away leaving the victim alone.
- The victim walked back to school all alone.
Two things can be said about the parent : STUPID & obviously he didn't perform Friday prayer that day

The school warden then brought the victim to Police station to lodge a report. Our very lazy police, tried to persuade the boy not to declare this a report, because it will be a lot of work for them. After hours of waiting and persuading and more interrogation, victim's family insisted to declare that report and wanted the police to proceed with the case. Hence, victim was examined by a doctor so a valid report could declare that the victim was injured.

The story:
Victim actually helped altered his friend's hair as requested by him after another boy cut his hair. Victim was merely helping and did not mean any harm. The culprit was the idiot who first laid his hands on the boy's hair. Anyways, because the boy was afraid of the culprit, he had pointed his finger on the victim. His stupid and angry father without any diplomacy or rationality simply took matters into his own hands.

Today: Victim felt sorry for his friend's father and mentioned that he will withdraw the report because this old man has many young children to care for. All the stupid old man did is offer his seemingly sincere apology and gave all the cash he had in his wallet to the victim's family.

Conclusion: Once again, only idiots would do this. Victim has a heart of gold. Parent is an unfit parent.

My child - I WOULD SUE!!!

Funny stories from Aspuri

At 10++ p.m.
A knock on my door.
I opened...

Teacher: Yes...?
Student: (Sobbing uncontrollably) Teacher...saya rasa saya tertelan...(cry,cry,cry) lalat dalam mee tadi!
Teacher: APE? (nak tergelak)
Student: Saya rasa saya tertelan lalat tadi...tapi saya taktau saya telan ke tak?
Teacher: Jap, awak rasa lalat tu dalam mulut awak?
Student: Takde, tapi kawan saya cakap dia nampak lalat dalam mee saya lepas saya dah makan.
Teacher: (Tak tahan sgt, so gelak) Ok, awak pun tak tau awak telan lalat tu ke tak? Awak sakit perut?
Student: (Shakes her head)
Teacher: Muntah?
Student: (Shakes her head)
Teacher: So takde apa-apa la...ok, kalau sakit perut bagitau teacher. takyah nangis-nangis. tidur ye

At 12 a.m.
A knock on our door.
One of my housemates opened the door.

Student 1: Teacher, cikgu...Azizuna ni pakai cincin ketat, Cikgu Fauziah suruh bukak sbb dah biru jari dia!
Teacher: Kenapa pakai cincin?
Azizuna: (Blur)
Teacher 2: Azizuna tau kan tak boleh pakai cincin? Ni cincin siapa? Ke cincin tunang?
Azizuna: Ni mak bagi
(Teachers looked at each other in disbelieve)
Teacher: Betul ke ni? Bukan emas tu...kenapa awak pakai kalau tau ketat? (Tries to pull out the ring. TOO TIGHT.
Student 2: Kami dah pakai sabun teacher, takmau keluar jugak.
Teacher: Dah tau ketat yg awak pakai jugak kenapa? Sekarang dah sakit.
(Teachers discuss among themselves)
Ms Aida: Kalau mcm ni kena pergi hospital! Cincin tu kena potong. Kita bukan ade alat dia.

We went to the hospital that night to remove A RING! A 20 cents worth ring which was forced into her ring finger and it was extremely tight it caused her finger to swell almost twice its actual size, and slightly blue. CRAZY!but true. A ha-ha-ha moment. HMM...Azizuna, Azizuna...

Bad Romance

The advancement in technology which is supposed to connect people and make lives easier has taken a toll in our lives apparently. First, we’ve all become lazier, we’re always occupied in front of our laptops – just like I’m doing right now. Second, we’ve lost actual real connection with people. It’s made life more complicated with all these new ways of communicating – let’s Skype, video call, text, mms or YM each other. Gone were the days when we only had one house phone, and we’d make plans to meet up. So, the guy either show up or not. Gone were the days when we only had a camera which had a roll of film and we can’t afford to mess up our pose because it’d be a waste. Instead now we take for granted of every snap and simply delete the ones we don’t like. We’d photoshop our pictures so we look less like who we really are and become almost like the person we wish to be.
Romance also has lost its novelty. With new and more advanced technology people no longer write love letters. Back in those days, couples would give each other’s hair to show love and affection. It’s almost like saying, “My love, here’s a part of me with you. Keep it,” . Odd, but that was deemed romantic. People wrote poems and definitely had a way with words. They wrote letters although miles apart, people wait and had faith. Such strong faith, grounded by LOVE. Now romance is reduced to very few syllables texted to one’s loved one hand phone and will soon be deleted. Nothing could be kept as a token of love, an evidence, a story to tell our grandkids of how grandma and grandpa fell in love.
Miss the days when we used the public phone with our coin box filled with precious coins to make that one phone call to a special someone. After which, we’ll have the longest most meaningful conversation. Our house phone would ring – now it rarely does because everyone has their own hand phone, and the person is either there or not there. Good times, but time has changed hasn’t it? And so has romance…

Beethoven - Love Letters of Great Men

Good morning, on July 7

Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, now and then joyfully, then sadly, waiting to learn whether or not fate will hear us - I can live only wholly with you or not at all - Yes, I am resolved to wander so long away from you until I can fly to your arms and say that I am really at home with you, and can send my soul enwrapped in you into the land of spirits - Yes, unhappily it must be so - You will be the more contained since you know my fidelity to you. No one else can ever possess my heart - never - never - Oh God, why must one be parted from one whom one so loves. And yet my life in V is now a wretched life - Your love makes me at once the happiest and the unhappiest of men - At my age I need a steady, quiet life - can that be so in our connection? My angel, I have just been told that the mailcoach goes every day - therefore I must close at once so that you may receive the letter at once - Be calm, only by a calm consideration of our existence can we achieve our purpose to live together - Be calm - love me - today - yesterday - what tearful longings for you - you - you - my life - my all - farewell. Oh continue to love me - never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.

ever thine
ever mine
ever ours


Tuesday, October 5, 2010

The Game Plan

Yesterday, I bumped into a teacher who used to teach in SMK Sri Rahmat, the school I did my practicum teaching. She recently got transferred to SMK TTDI Jaya in Shah Alam. She is from Shah Alam and was posted to JB, if I’m not mistaken in January 2009 or mid-2008. So, it took quite a while for her to get transferred to her hometown. According to a very trusted source, a teacher’s transfer is ultimately in the hands of the school principal who will personally submit your online application as well as write his or her recommendation, as in whether or not you are recommended for this transfer. So, if the place you are about to exit closes its door on your face, you’re pretty much stuck where you are.
Based on the information I’ve gathered from a few people, I’ve derived a so-called game plan so I could go back. Note that this is just an idea, not a clear cut plan because you can only plan so much, right? Ultimately, Allah decides. But just for the fun of it and the sake of this entry and some spark of motivation, I’m going to write down what I think anyways. Please, just bear with it. Here goes:
1. Wait another 2 years because my boss promised 3 years in the first school, I’ve done 1 so 2 more.
2. Get married (HAHAHA) slightly before the 2 years end. This is what happened to the teacher in Sri Rahmat. She got married sometime August last year. She tried for transfer end of last year but it was unsuccessful so she tried again June this year and now she’s teaching in Shah Alam. Still, the couple had to be separated for a while before they could be together. So perhaps if I get engaged before that 2 years end and then get married shortly after, I could submit my transfer then and that would make me ‘mature’ enough in this school to be released.
3.Persevere, persevere, persevere.
4.Patience, patience, patience.
5.Contribute, contribute, contribute.
6.Live, love and have lots of fun.
7.Make friends and not enemies – EVER!
8.Find my soul mate, who’d love me and commit :)
9.Start masters once you get transferred
10.Teach, study and be a wife and insyaAllah mom all at the same time – Can I? YES, I CAN

To be honest, I like the school I’m teaching now. I especially love the camaraderie spirit and warm hospitality from the teachers. It’s only in this school have I experienced Isra’ Mikraj celebration so huge and auspicious it made me felt less homesick then. I also love quite a number of students who always listen to me,respect me and in fact admires me. I also know there are people who do not quite like the attention I’m somewhat getting. I don’t think I’m boasting because to tell you the truth I’m not used to this either. I’m not used to people thinking I’m pretty or smart. Somehow I was quite overwhelmed by everything. Nonetheless, work is work. I try to always be professional. I try my level best to be nice to all, perhaps with the exception of one person. But then again, I’m not hostile towards her. What I’m trying to say is, my wanting to transfer is not due to my inability to adapt, and definitely not because I can’t adjust in the environment here. I don’t hate anything about this place. I’ve taken a lot of liking towards this place actually. However, the saying "there’s no place like home" is definitely true in every sense. It’s the only way to explain how I feel. I have missed a couple of years being at home as I was in JB before this, and I was miserable for many years. Due to that misery I missed having fun with many friends. I was too absorbed in my own miserable world – I was not myself. So, if I could stay at home I could have more bonding sessions with my family and friends, I could perhaps have a gym membership and hit the gym with Fad and Shaela, I could have more fun. But life isn’t about fun all the time, especially when you’re just starting out. Aida, work on number 3-7 first before number 8 eventually comes. Hope number 8 will be a good man for me. Will love me like he loves his family and also love my family. Someone who has my best interest at heart at all times and will never forsake me. Amen. Is that too much to ask? I'm not high maintenance, I'm not really demanding, small gestures and thoughtful acts make me happy. That's about it. Of course he's got to be a responsible man, religious in a way, and has a stable career. Okay, I shall end this entry here before it turns out to be an essay about My Ideal Man. (LOL)

Monday, October 4, 2010

To all PMR 2010 candidates

This goes out to all PMR 2010 candidates!!! haha, i was a PMR 2000 candidate, it's been 10 years since I sat for PMR! All the best dear students!!!

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Teacher letting her hair down!!!

Yesterday's posting sounded very emotional...but today's, is definitely a cheerful one! Why? Because we played in the's unbelievable how simple pleasures could really help you forget all your worries...huhuuhu...i hope I don't catch a cold...hehe, nasty idea: dpt mc and ponteng skolah pon rock jugak!!! haha...i had the 'awesomest' time...sudden thought, triggered by reading someone else's blog: could the best of friends be the be best of partners? as in soul mate? i think i'm a bit hormonal...why am i constantly thinking of love? i'm sick! haha...

Friday, October 1, 2010

Dear Life

Dear Life,
I'm writing to you because I find you very mysterious. I've been trying to get to know you but I realised, the more I tried the more I failed to comprehend. Hence, I have decided to stop. Amazingly, when I did and also stopped analysing every detail you surprise me. Things just happened to work better. Nonetheless, sometimes you throw me challenges and inevitable sadness, occasional loneliness and at times disappointments. Although I must admit I hate it when the fate of my future is determined by circumstances in which I was simply left without a choice, I also believe that every cloud has a silver lining. There were times I saw nothing but utter darkness, life ahead that seemed so bleak but I remember a promise you once made, that things always get better.
Hey, life. Yesterday I was disheartened, I was anxious about my future and I was afraid I might be setting my feet into a trap. It sounded like an offer but everyone knows the truth, it's just another trap. However, in my position I couldn't say NO. I need a place to stay because I'm far away from home. At the same time, I am terrified because I fear that I may fail to take care of so many kids. I don't have the energy nor the patience to be there for that many students. I will feel socially deprived. I will feel homesick and not to mention the lack of sleep I'll face when I spend my nights at the hospital bringing one student after another in the wee hours of the morning. To shut the door on their innocent, sick faces...I'll die of guilt should anything bad happen to them. Then again, he had promised me three years in this school and I can choose to leave if I want to. One year is done, two more to go. No, I don't hate this school. I like this school, the camaraderie spirit and the warm hospitality is nothing like I've experienced elsewhere before. So life, since this is what I felt as written for me I chose to be strong and persevere instead. At least I'm not in some utterly remote area where there isn't even a phone line! I also hope, with this new responsibility I'd be given an opportunity to be pardoned from my sins and gain 'pahala' for all my good deeds. I hope I'll be given a genuine heart with good intentions and lastly I hope good things will happen to me and InsyaAllah my prayers to Him will be answered and wishes granted.
One last thing life, if you do come to an end for me do know that I've learnt a lot from you and I'm forever grateful for the opportunities, happiness and also valuable lessons you have taught me. If you do come to an end for my grandma who is getting weaker by the day (this is really making me emotional), please let me be with her when she goes, please let me grant her last wish or I'll be carrying it around for the rest of my life.
Life, treat my loved ones as kind as possible because they have loved me and have unconditionally supported me since day one. I hope I have many, many, many more years of you.